Kids can be so distant. Every person who’s given birth is technically an elite bodybuilder. A nice set of steak knives would have gone over better. Which explains why so many country stars sing “The Star-Spangled Banner” at football games. Only one man can legitimately tell this dad joke. Read it again if you didn’t get it the first time.ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb It’s true what they say: If you say it in front of your kids, they’ll repeat it at the worst possible time. Better than the alternative but still unacceptable. Free bees?? Where? And what’s more peaceful than a slumbering bovine? RELATED: For more up-to-date information, sign up for our daily newsletter. Wear the proper protective gear, and this won’t happen. How you do that is up to moo. We’re pretty sure this is Creed Bratton from The Office speaking. He deserves some self-care every once in a while. And she wants it right now! And I’ll be standing six feet away from you when I do it. It’s almost the same thing, really. Hey, it’s not easy to own your mistakes. And they’re never coming back. But it might just be a pilot program.
